To succeed in your connection with your horse – to really succeed in the interaction – the aspects behind the technique need to be addressed. Techniques whether it is horsemanship, traditional dressage technique or other proved methods to train horses can be good tools by hand, but they can be an efficient way of hiding from something that is not so pleasant to feel. Handling horses is not so much about technique as it is about feel and touch.
The handler’s way of treating horses reveals where you are in your personal development. It is common knowledge that horses, and other animals, read you like an open book. It is your choice to decide what to do with the information given to you from the horses.
Are you so focused on doing the technique you have learned from a guru correct, that you forget to see the bigger picture of you and your horse? Are you trying so hard to do it exactly the same way as your instructor showed you, that the joy of training is gone?
What is the correct method – who can tell?
Some branches of horsetraining are based on keeping the horse distanced from you. With long ropes are the horses not allowed to come close to you, if they do they are disrespectful. Often the ones who are most into working on keeping the horse on distance – and who succeed the most – is the ones who have most distance to self, distance to own emotions. By keeping this distance to the horse how will that connection become? By keeping distance to yourself how will you be able to connect with others – horses or humans? How will you be able to connect with yourself?
Others keep the rope tight to be in control. By controlling everything, can it be you miss something? Miss the crucial sign because you are too busy to control the horse. Too busy to keep the control that you end up fighting the horse? Often those who pick the fights and cling to the ropes, have a tendency of controlling their emotions and end up fighting them.
A good leader, is that the one who keep everyone on a distance? Or is a good leader the one who have short leash, controlling every step?
A good leader is a confident leader. A leader who can differentiate situations. Who can see if this was a creative stunt that can lead to something positive, or if this is a situation that can lead to failure, danger or damage. A good leader is the one who is able to see the bigger picture and don’t get hung up in techniques. A good leader sees what is needed for this particular team to unlock potential and maximize performance. This is how it is in the corporate world, this is how it is in school and this is even how it is in the stable.
To master your own life you have to take the lead of yourself, you have to become the confident and balanced leader of your own life. To become a good leader you have to be willing to improve, to look into your own patterns. Being open-minded and curious are a good start. The more open you, as a horsehandler, are to look into your own patterns, the more you open up for the good relationship with your horse. You start to know your horse in a different way, and you get the confidence to find your own way and your own methods, you tailor your own path with your horse.
You want your horse with life-spirit, you want a horse who enjoys its work. Do you sparkle? Does your life-spirit flourish? Do you enjoy working with your horse?
To create a balance in your relation with your horse, you as a horse-handler has to dare yourself, challenge yourself. You have to be true with your own emotions. This is the basis of every connection with horses, of every connection with any animal.
Every individual is unique, every interaction is unique.